Akting Out

I was originally going to write about unrequited love. After all, that’s traditionally what “the one that got away” means, right?

Someone you once loved, but couldn’t have…

That subject got me in hot water with my girlfriend, so I thought I’d come at this from another angle. Apparently, “the one that got away” can also mean someone you would be with, if you could.

I didn’t know that. Honest.

So, another angle…

In another state, another life, a friend and I are hyped after seeing Star Wars: Episode II. So psyched are we that we immediately head to the nearest Toys’ R Us and purchase lightsabers that our favorite characters in the film use. Naturally, being the epitome of immaturity, we begin talking smack to each other en route to his car. Finally, I lay down the penultimate challenge; “You can’t beat me.”

Right then, right there.

It becomes a race as we furiously discard the packaging, remove the casing, and insert the batteries (doesn’t everyone carry a screwdriver in their pocket just to insert batteries into their lightsaber?). With quick whipping motions, and the push of a button, we’re a long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.

I’ve been trained in how to use a sword; it’s usually given me an advantage when I have a sparring partner. Not today; part of the reason why we’re friends is because neither of us ever give up.

It is an epic match of give and take, one of the most thrilling lightsaber duel I’ve ever had (and I’ve had a lot). We back each other up until we’re back in the Toys R’ Us, completely oblivious to the summer shoppers, who I’m sure were scrambling out of our way.

We stab, deflect, and parry our way in a frenzied pace throughout half the store, garnering an audience. Moments are intense; I knock the blade away from him, he kicks me in the chest, buying himself enough time to recover. I use martial arts, throwing kicks to get him off balance and he’s so much more agile than me I might as well be fighting Spider-Man.

Not only could either of us gain an advantage, neither of us could land a fatal blow.

Apparently, we garnered a crowd of excited children, bewildered parents, and employees had hadn’t the slightest idea of what to do. Someone whispered; “Someone should call security!” to which someone immediately countered; “No! Let ‘em fight!”

It came to a head in the bike aisle. We were so engrossed in the conflict, and so frustrated with each other…we had taken our game to new heights for this. I lunged at him, he sidestepped and went for a killing blow aimed at my head. I ducked, the lightsaber caught a pink bike on the row above us, and somehow it came loose, landing neatly, without much fanfare, right in between us.

Then we became aware of the outside world. Awkward.

We were permitted to leave-and never allowed to return.

Our friendship endured beyond that, although we both promised one day we would settle things, once and for all. People like us never leave a fight unfinished.

But time moved us in different directions. I’m here, he wound up moving down South; he’s married with a family now.

If I have to pick one that got away, it would be him. It’s the only fight I have ever left unfinished.

I would also like to take this moment and say I am extremely grateful that I’m even able to attract a member of the opposite sex.

(c) Avery K. Tingle for Akting Out LLC

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