Chasing Dreams
I used to think that privacy was the most important thing in the world. I was wrong; it’s freedom. Specifically, it’s the ability to do what you want, when you want. If time is the only thing you cannot reclaim, why would you not want to spend as much of it as possible doing what you want?
I’ve never seen the point of slaving away for thirty years at a job you settled for. Now, granted, I’m a little older, I understand the point of having to make a living, but it’s like slow death with some people; I watch them lose more and more of themselves on a job that doesn’t seem to care. In this economy, the job can afford not to care, because everyone’s looking for work. No one is irreplaceable.
Now, here’s the thing; as far as jobs go, this one isn’t bad. They put a lot into training us, the hourly wage is good, the end-of-the-month potential is really good, and the benefits aren’t so bad. To be honest, it’s the most money I’ve ever made legally, and I’m grateful for that.
But I have no illusions. This is their world and their rules, and we are reminded of that every single day. And…writing this, I realize that this is the way of things; they made this world, they’re entitled to set the rules as they see fit. If we don’t like it, we all know exactly where the exit is.
There was one point in time I could laugh at anything. Instead, I find myself burning out within three hours of arriving at work and so exhausted when I get home I can barely do anything else. To hell with this.
Five years ago (hell, three years ago) I would’ve just quit. BUT, I’m a little older now, and thickheaded as I am, I still learn from my mistakes. No, I’m not going anywhere. Not just yet, anyway.
God gave me a preview of what my life could be if I was willing to work for it; in between my last job and this one, I was supporting myself (mostly). Sure, I had help, but I was going to bed and getting up when I wanted, if I was hungry, I could eat, if I felt like playing, I could. As long as I made deadline, I was fine. I lived this way for five months before I was unable to sustain it anymore.
It was proof that it can be done.
My job is a good job, but I don’t want to be there in two years. I have no intention of dying a slow death. I’m willing to put in sixteen hour days if it means that Universal Warrior becomes the Star Wars of this generation. So rather than bitch, moan, and complain, I go into work every day and remind myself that I have to work that much harder to ensure that one day (soon), I won’t have to go back.
Because once I put my mind to something, I know I’ll achieve it. It’s how I survived and got off the street. This? This is nothing. Just another fight, albeit longer than what I’m used to.
That’s how I chase dreams. Thanks for reading.
(c) Avery K. Tingle for Akting Out LLC
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