Akting Out

Today, I was leaving my work with a group of friends. It was a regular day, punctuated by us going on and on about how much we despise our jobs and how we’d do anything short of selling our souls to not have to return. I’m usually the one out in front on these sorts of things. I have no head for corporate America. That selling-our-souls part is negotiable.
Across the street, in the awning of a local bank, a homeless man stands with everything he owns stuffed into garbage bags. His hands are in his pockets, and he’s dressed for the cold; it’s supposed to rain soon, and getting into the Salvation Army here is tricky. Chances are he’ll be on his own tonight.
I’m the only one who sees this man, and doing so silences any protest about my job. I looked at him and saw myself ten years ago, although he was much older than I am now. I gave him the spare cash I had on me—six bucks—in hopes of appeasing my conscience, which was railing me. How dare you be so ungrateful.

I’m thirty-four years old now. I never thought I’d see thirty. I never thought I’d have a relationship with my kids, never thought I’d live on my own anyplace nice, never thought I’d have a career that didn’t involve crime or violence. Never thought I’d be any sort of role model. But here I am.

We take so much in our day-to-day life for granted. It’s easy to become complacent; we gripe about rising gas prices while forgetting we have cars that get us to and from where we need to be. I bitch about a job that doesn’t treat me well, but I wouldn’t be where I was today without it.

The secret of (my) success is simple; never take anything for granted. A simple set of circumstances can take you from where you are to the worst place you can imagine. Live in each moment, while being aware of the future. Don’t sit and waste precious time pondering your future; go get it. If you fail, you fail. So what? Learn from what you did before and try again. Keep trying till you get it right. You either will, or learn a hell of a lot on the way.

All of this was inspired by a homeless man I crossed paths with today. I like to think that the next time I want to bitch about something, I’ll remember the big picture, smile, and go on with my day.

I hope you do too.

Thanks for reading.

(c) Avery K. Tingle for Akting Out LLC

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“Let’s end this!!”
Adamantium tears through metal sheaths on the back of X-23′s hands (at least, I think they’re metal sheaths. I’m not too up on my Marvel these days). Her elbows are tucked at her sides, her knees bent, her eyes ablaze, she looks like Wolverine-Lite. Capcom got this right.
She slides as though on grease towards her hapless opponent (in this case, Spencer of Bionic Commando fame) and with a flurry of extremely-painful looking slashes dealt from her hands and feet, because she has claws on her feet too, she utterly decimates poor Spencer, capitalizing the knockout blow by leaping and descending with two slash marks meant to resemble an “X” as ominous sound effects signal the end of Spencer and the arrival of the new victim.
I can’t help but think when I play these games and read these comics; this would never fly in the real world. I try to imagine how a real-life Wolverine would survive today, and I always get the same answer; however he wants. I confess; even at thirty-four, I still sometimes look down at my hands and wonder how much simpler life would be if I had STEEL CLAWS. I know there are greater powers to dream about, but the idea of watching someone piss themselves when metal knives shoot out of the back of my hands? Priceless.

You have to take joy in the little things.
I remember praying at the beginning of the year; I wanted to make some changes. I wanted to be done with diabetes, I didn’t want to be afraid of anything anymore, and I wanted to have my legal troubles resolved. A little secret about God; eventually, you learn what to ask for, and how to ask for it, in order to receive it. But it always comes with a trial.
I really don’t have much to complain about these days, I certainly have it easier than a lot of people, and for that, I’m grateful. I have a good place to live in a nice part of town (although I have a hard time thinking of any area of Jefferson City as bad, when you stack it against north side Saginaw, east Oakland, Jersey City, or a hundred other ghettos out there), I have food in the fridge, I’ve got all the materialistic things that make me happy, I have a very good job that I am very good at, and very good at bitching about, I have people who care about me and I’m learning not to push them away. Even now, I sit in my living room, Law and Order: SVU is paused, and I’m writing this from my laptop as I take in the morning coffee and hope it has its usual effect. Even the writing is going really, really well.

As writers, we can’t afford the luxury of fear. It’s easy to hide behind being afraid and tell yourself that you’re not good enough, that no one else will ever like what you do. Then, when you choose inaction, in your own mind, it’s justified. You suck, right? So why bother trying? And to be honest, it’s not a bad way to think. Chances are no one will ever develop the same attachment to your characters and worlds that you have. Chances are even greater that some people will hate your work simply because they have nothing better to do. Others may not like and offer constructive criticism (and we’d be wise to take it), but that’s just the way it goes. The fact is; you never know how good, or bad, you may be until you try.

Someone may hate your work. Someone else may love it and recommend it to others. These others may want to help you advance. But you won’t know until you put yourself out there.
This is philosophy with which I try to live my life; take the chance. Yes, you might suck, but at least by trying, you know. On the other end, what if you’re really, really good, and someone’s just waiting to discover you?

Fear is a test; you can let it cripple you, or you can look at it logically and overcome it. Heights; it’s not the height itself that will kill you, it’s not even the fall. It’s the frakkin landing. Hence, don’t put yourself in a position to fall, sit back, and enjoy the view. Snakes, spiders, bugs, and the like, same thing; it’s not the critters themselves that will harm you. It’s the bite, or sting, or squeeze or whatever. If you don’t put yourself in a position where these things can happen to you, you have nothing to be afraid of. Or, if you get stung enough times, you get used to it. Some people around the world are bitten so often that their body builds immunity to the poison. True story.

I’m past all of the materialistic fears; heights, snakes, spiders, and all that stuff. I’m afraid of being successful because I don’t know what it feels like, and I’m afraid if it happens, I’ll lose it all and end up at rock bottom again. I’m afraid that I can’t make it on my own on a professional level. I’m really afraid of personal relationships (but who isn’t?)

Universal Warrior: Atherean Defenders has a publisher. The announcement will be coming in about one month. So that’s beginning my dealing with the fear of success.
My relationship ended not too long ago. Rather than throwing myself into something else quickly (as has been my habit), I’m feeling this. It sucks. She’s going through something I wouldn’t wish on anyone, something that had nothing to do with us. We still talk, we’re cordial, and I like to think we’ve both been very accommodating. It still sucks, but it’ll pass.

I’ve been on the same performance-based schedule-changing job for the past two years now. I’m afraid that with the new system we’re learning, I won’t be able to keep up. I won’t be able to use the same tricks that got me this far. In my heart, where God resides, I know that things will be okay. They always are.

I have one less warrant in the state of Michigan.

This is set to be a difficult year. But a good one.

Thanks for reading, I wish you all of the best in your endeavors, and thank you for sticking with Life As I Play It thus far.

(c) Avery K. Tingle for Akting Out LLC

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Zeus smirked as he looked right, towards his brother. “Come on.” He goaded, “Say it.”
Odin seemed to scowl, disappointed as he cast a sideways glance at Zeus, and the two began making their way down the stairs. “I will not.” His voice was deep, rumbling, baritone, belying his unassuming frame. “It was not a fair contest.”
“Well, you should’ve considered that before you made the wager.” Zeus countered, their sandals echoing loudly through the great chamber as they made their way towards the small crowd. “But in the meantime,” Zeus pointed at himself confidently with his thumb, “I am the victor.”
“Take whatever small victory you wish, Zeus.” Odin growled, a cocky smile creeping across his face. “It does not change the outcome of our last match…or the match before that one…or the match before…”
“Hey.” Zeus stopped, turning and pointing a finger in Odin’s face. “That last one doesn’t count. The only reason why you won was because you threw the moon at me.”
“And how is your inability to defend yourself my concern, dear brother?” Odin smiled. Zeus slowly lowered his finger; there was nothing to say. Odin tapped him twice on the shoulder. “You trained your pupil well, brother. The victory is yours. But we know who the better of us is, do we not?”
Odin chuckled as he headed towards the small group, Reginald’s mouth still open as he took the entire scene in, awestruck. Zeus followed after a moment, whispering at his brother, under his breath; “Arrogant ass.”

(c) Avery K. Tingle for Akting Out LLC

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I’ve always said that if I publish Atherean Defenders, it would be free, and I meant it. If I self-publish the title, you’ll never pay one red cent for it. Unfortunately, that also means that there won’t be a print edition when it’s initially released. To be honest, I can’t afford it on my own.
If I self- publish, I can make Atherean Defenders available as a PDF, for those of you who want to hold a copy in your hand. I was even thinking of a promotion where I could assist with printing costs for those of you who wanted a hard copy, although I hadn’t thought of anything yet. Also, if Atherean Defenders is self-published, it will be available on the Amazon Kindle, as well as other major online book retailers, such as Smashwords. Truthfully, I don’t know if Amazon will let me give away the title on their site. I doubt it, though.

My primary concern with publishing Atherean Defenders has always been retention of rights; I’m not giving anyone the rights to do anything with this story without my permission. Retaining creative control means more to me than making a ton of money (at this point), so I never even considered the idea of publishing the story. All the research I’ve done, and I doubted a publishing house would take a chance on me anyway. I’d rather write the story and let the readers decide if I was any good.

But a publisher approached me; retaining my rights is no longer a concern. Plus, I trust the publisher.

If I sign this contract, Atherean Defenders is realized in both online and offline formats. The book becomes available—in print—on Amazon, and God willing, every other retailer out there. I also gain some serious marketing muscle in addition to my own efforts. The trade-off is; the book will no longer be free.

So that’s what it comes down too. I self-publish, the book is free, but electronic only. I go with a publisher, the book becomes available in print, at a cost.

So the question I put to you is; do you like this story enough to pay for it?

Either comment or message me (keep it clean, please), and I promise I have thick skin, so any constructive advice would be welcome. Thanks for following along and replying, in advance.

(c) Avery K. Tingle for Akting Out LLC

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I’ve long said that parents should be taking responsibility for what their children watch, read and play, especially since the nineties when violent video games became a controversial topic. Rather than censor the violence, I feel it’s better to educate parents so they don’t bring games into their home that they may not want their children playing. I grew up gaming; most of the people I grew up with are still gamers themselves, so it’s easy to take the knowledge for granted. I assumed that everyone was familiar with the ESRB and the ratings system. I was wrong.

A couple of weeks ago, a friend and co-worker was telling the story of how she picked up a PS3 for her children and Call of Duty: Black Ops to go along with it. My jaw hit the floor at hearing this; no way would I ever allow either of my kids, no matter how good their grades, to play something like that. I couldn’t understand why this woman would allow her children to be exposed to something so gratuitous, and I was about to lay into her until she explained that she had absolutely no experience with video games. Her kids had asked for it, and she bought it, it was that simple.

That’s when it hit me what little some parents know about these games their kids are playing.

Now that gaming is a mainstream hobby, I think it’s more important than ever to educate parents, and any interested party, on the ESRB and the rating system in general. As gamers who have grown and become parents ourselves, it’s not just our responsibility to defend our livelihood; it’s also our job to help those not in the know make better decisions.

The Entertainment Software Rating Board (ESRB for short) is a nonprofit organization that functions the same way the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) does. The difference is that where the MPAA rates movies, the ESRB rates games. Because ratings are so rarely enforced, the efficiency of the ESRB has often been questioned.

Almost any video game available for purchase has been rated by the ESRB, and can be viewed in the lower left hand corner of every title.

Figure 1: Rockstar’s wildly successful “Grand Theft Auto” has earned its M rating from the ESRB. Note the tag in the lower left hand corner of the picture.

All titles are broken down into the following categories, with short explanations explaining each rating. Here’s a quick explanation of what you need to know, along with a breakdown of each rating.

Figure 2: The ESRB Rating System

The most common games these days are typically rated either “T” or “M”. When it comes to a T-rated title, I strongly encourage you to research the title a bit. Information is almost always available online, and while some “T” rated titles might contain material that you consider okay for your children, others may not.

Figure 3: Generally, Sega’s “Sonic The Hedgehog” series is comprised of titles rated “E”, which means the mischief in this game is okay for anyone to view.

Figure 4: Mortal Kombat, a long-running fighting game series, will almost certainly be an M-rated title upon release for its depictions of violence.

The best way to ensure what your children play is to first learn the title of the game they’re playing, and then enter that title into the search engine of your choice to see what the title is about. If the ESRB hasn’t rated it yet, wait for a rating to be assigned before making promises or decisions.

You can learn more about the ESRB by clicking here. There are also mobile apps available for both droid and iPhone users so information can be gathered instantly by snapping a photo of the title.

Thanks for reading.

(c) Avery K. Tingle for Akting Out LLC

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