Life As I Play It

Last year was the first NaNoWriMo I ever participated in. It was also the first one I ever won. If you had told me that this was where I’d be one year later, I never would’ve believed it.

Someone (who I will thank in a moment) liked my work enough to encourage me to get into web-fiction. Another friend suggested that I try my luck at freelance writing, and one year later, here I am.

When I first envisioned Uprising, it was meant to serve as hype for the Last Campaign. You know, hype up one story by writing another?
I really bit off more than I could chew, I admit it. Suddenly, I have to worry about deadlines, website management (I really hate wordpress sometimes) and suggestions from (gasp!) actual fans. I write that, and I say it out loud, and it still blows my mind; my story has fans.

Universal Warrior: Uprising concluded late last week. Over nearly fifty chapters, the story has thus far achieved a total of more than one thousand, five hundred individual views and a smattering of comments.  Unexpectedly, a number of requests have come in for hard copies of the story—and I’m seriously considering updating and publishing the novel. But we’ll talk about that later.

I wanted to take a quick moment and extend my sincerest gratitude to everyone who tuned in every week, stuck by me during my downtime, and took my imagination in places I never thought it would go. I want to thank every single one of you who read this story from beginning to end, because as trite as this may seem, if you’re not reading, I have no reason to write, so thank you for giving me a little bit of your time each week.

I also want to take a little time to thank some people who helped me get to where I am going.
Kenneth Jamieson, for turning me onto Twitter, hand-holding me through the internet, performing my website maintenance, the advice and guidance, and most importantly, the ten-year friendship.

Chris Tejeda, who first encouraged me to pursue a professional writing career, and everything else.

Dianne “Keikomushi” Owenns, for being my first real fan, for her tireless promotion of Universal Warrior, and because Jamendo, podcasting, you in general, kick ass. J

Alan Baxter, for all the retweets, the chance to appear on his blog, the good conversation, and the guidance when it comes to martial arts.

Samantha Buschkopf, who was there at the turbulent beginning, who I’m blessed to have as a friend today.

And last, certainly not least, Molly Greider, for reasons too many to numerate.

Also, quick shoutouts to my mother, Paula Henry, Dorothy Cardwell, Jessica Cazier, Frances Gonzalez, Abner Senires, Laura Eno, Raymond Williams, and Tammey Sweezer for the advice, asking for copies of the book, or just being there. The brightest souls I know. J

Thanks to everyone. There’s more to come, but for now, I’m going to enjoy a nice, looong break. Till the Angels return.

(c) Avery K. Tingle for Modern Magic Enterprises LTD and Nomadic Productions LLC

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One can’t live in two worlds, I’m realizing. Eventually, you have to make a choice.

You also choose the friends that are worth fighting for.

I have two good friends; one of them enforces a system I don’t really believe in, yet we’re friends anyway. Another disagrees with the system as strongly as I do, but may have broken what is, in my opinion, an unbreakable law. I can’t prove if he did or didn’t; for a change, I did not blindly follow my first instinct, which would’ve led to violence. Instead, I thought things through.

While my law-enforcing friend became angry with me (for not doing the right thing), I stood against the world and desperately tried to convince my wayward friend to cease his involvement—any type of involvement—with an underage girl. In a few short weeks, he had gone from being in love with her to looking at her like a daughter. The thought of it made me want to vomit. How can you do this?! Who the hell are you and what have you done with my friend?!

I saw my friend and the underage girl together, physically flirting and whispering to one another when they thought nobody would notice. I convinced myself that it wasn’t what I knew it was.

Last week, I needed a ride to the career center. My wayward friend agreed to drive me. I had to be there at two; he showed up at a quarter till…with his underage friend in tow.

Millions of questions flooded my mind: Why was she there? Why wasn’t she in school? Why did she keep saying that they had just woke up?

I cut him off after that…for a minute. It’s the Christian thing to forgive, right? Ugh… Besides, it’s not like I was able to prove that he was doing anything illegal. Maybe he was just confused. Maybe someone is going to sell me the St. Louis Arch.

I cornered him, and demanded to know what was going on. I wondered if I was really fighting for him or just struggling to hold on to one of the first face-to-face friendships I’ve had in years.

He told me that he was dating the underage girl’s mother, and that he was spending time with her children in an attempt to get to know them better.

Avery: Thank God. That makes sense.
Busterwolf: You’re lying, and I know you’re lying, you sick f***.

I forgave him. We patched things up.

Yesterday, the girl’s mother happened to be at a friend’s house and I asked her, point blank, if she has been seeing Billy. She denied it. Of course.

I let my instincts guide me as she told me how she was sick of the rumor; she’s never done anything with Billy.

This means, the night we patched things up, someone I considered one of my closest friends lied to me yet again. He lied to me as he promised not to lie to me again.

Crushed, I realized the truth.

I headed home and tracked down my law-enforcing friend. We hadn’t spoken in awhile, and my message was simple: We need to talk.

When he showed up, he wasn’t in uniform, which was good: He would to talk to me as a friend, rather than as a cop. He was cordial as he entered my home and shook my hand. He knew why I had called him. When he took a seat on my couch, I unloaded like a dump truck.

No, I’ve never seen anything illicit between these two with my own eyes. Yes, I thought the situation was worth investigating. Yes, I had seen a lot of physical play between the two, and yes, I thought it was inappropriate. It’s been going on for about a month now…

I lied in a recent myspace survey; I think I cried last night. I know I kept wiping my eyes. I can’t believe I’m doing this.

My friend wrote down everything I said, then closed his notepad and folded his hands. He lowered his head for a moment and just exhaled; one doesn’t become numb to this kind of thing, and it’s a lot to take in.

He looked up to me and asked me, off the record, if I thought these two were being sexual.

…
Yes. I say it out loud.

Whoa…
I was suddenly sprinting for the toilet and there went dinner. I hadn’t thrown up in years, and it was like my body was making up for it. I threw up until it hurt, and I was clutching my stomach. It felt like coughing up acid. Thankfully, there was no blood.

My friend didn’t help. He just waited patiently in my front room.
He did, however, ask me if I felt better when I re-emerged. Not really, I said.

We talked—my friends are good at that—about what it really meant to be someone’s father.

When you’re someone’s father, he told me, you have to lead by example. You don’t cut and run when you get angry with someone. You fight for them for all you’re worth, and when that fails, you do the right thing…

I know he is right, but it doesn’t make me feel any better.

Chances are there will be no legal action taken, as there’s no proof. Still, I can say that I did all I could, and mean it.

If I’m going to show my children how to live in this world, I have to do it myself first.

So there it is. I still feel like crud, but I’ll get past it, and maybe one day my former friend will wake up, or maybe he won’t, but that’s between him and God.

I have my own issues to sort through, and I need to keep people in my life who have similar (healthy) goals.

Those are the friends worth fighting for.

(c) Avery K. Tingle for Modern Magic Enterprises LTD and Nomadic Productions LLC

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